Bad News

The small procedure for my hip for bursitis never happened because it turns out the pain was generated from having ZERO cartilage there. The doc had a slideshow up on his computer of my x-rays from August 2012-December 2012-May 2013-today up and it was like a short cartoon of disappearing space between my hip bone and thigh bone. There’s practically nothing there.

I’ve been told to make my peace with running. And I’m so sad.

But the sadness is a bit overwhelmed at the cost and time of a full hip replacement. I’ve been told to delay this procedure as long as possible because although the implants have improved, I’ll outlive them and will have to go through the expense of replacing the replacements maybe once or or even twice over my expected life.

ARRRRRGHHHH.

On top of that, my wonderful boyfriend has decided to pick a fight with me over taking up running in the first place. I became emotionally stronger because of running. I saw sights and experienced joys and sadness not found elsewhere. I reached what felt like physically impossible goals. I got yelled at by a drill sergeant when all I wanted to do was stop at 26.0 miles because of the pain. I’m a more rounded person because of running. And I miss it terribly.

I regret not a single step.

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7 comments
  1. Anita said:

    Awwwwww, Lenore. That is very bad news. There’s no consolation at all in the platitude “well, at least now you know what’s wrong”. To encourage you: I know a man who leads a very physical life – he owns a plant nursery and grafts thousands of apple trees every year, and he rows, and has a humungous garden, generally if it’s light out he’s outside doing something. He had a hip replacement several years ago as a not-very-middle-aged-yet man, and always says he’s glad he did. Plus he had no medical insurance at the time – paid cash for the procedure! The mind boggles… Maybe it’s wise to wait, but a life with much less pain has its attractions, doesn’t it? Don’t suffer needlessly!

    • That’s reassuring to hear!! And amazing he paid it all out of his own pocket. I . . . can’t afford that. Just bought a house. I’m talking with a PT I know to see what can be done for pain management in the meantime before I go for my follow up in 2 months. If I’m miserable, I’ll make the call then, get my deductible all squared away and aim to spend another set of holidays on my back. Screw work. They’re taking away sick pay next year.

  2. Patti said:

    Oh, momma. I’m so sorry. There are so many other things you can do, but take the time you need to grieve the loss of something that gave you so much.

    I have heard the same things on replacement. But, I have also seen the remarkable difference in a life when pain-free. Yes, you’ll need it again, but maybe only once with advances being made.

    • Meeting you at my very first marathon will always be one of my favorite-est things. EVER. I wonder if they can make me taller with these replacements? Maybe a whole 5 feet tall?! Dare I dream?!

  3. I’m so sorry. There are always things to do though! You’ll always be someone looking for those challenges. Can you swim?

    • My mile swim is stuck at 30-31min. 2mi is about 1hr5min. It’s burnout, swimming is all I’ve done for a year. It’s a goal to get consistently under 30min/1hr for both but I’m in no hurry since there’s no local Ironman distance relay.

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